My first Autism blog proved to be quite popular and the messages of support I received were a bit of a kick up the backside, encouraging me to carry on with blogging.
You see I was never that kid who kept a diary. So, typing into a big blank page on a computer screen and getting no immediate response is quiet odd to me. I'm that girl who likes a visual response, figures that I'm a photographer hey!
One of the messages I received through Facebook said:
"I wish I had the balls to do what you have done."
That got me thinking ........ what would a parent of a autistic superstar want people to know?
So I posed this question to my Facebook friends and these are the responses I got. Maybe you agree, maybe you don't. Perhaps this makes you think about what it's like for that harassed looking parent on the playground. Either way open dialogue is what is needed.
1. Our kids are not naughty and we don't need advice on how to be better parents. We just want acceptance and understanding for hidden disabilities. Wendy Harrogate.
2. We have to fight everyday for our kids. Fight for them to be accepted, fight for them to not be labelled as bad , fight for all the extra help they need, fight to make the world understand our beautiful children with this hidden disability and fight for ourselves as parents to keep swimming forward even on the hardest days to prove to our kids they may be different but isn't that a good thing? The world would be a very boring place if not! Julie Ralph.
3. Be open-minded and patient. They are fascinating kids that can do incredible things with the right support around them. They are not going to fit in a box, and who wants to fit in a box anyway! Im a very lucky mum 💙 xx Roxy Long.
4. Our kids are not naughty, they have to deal with their own battles daily, no matter how old they are, even at 17 you’re always told “he/she should know better than to behave like a brat." Jemma Payne.
5. Everyone is facing a battle and some are more hidden than others. Sometimes just keeping your opinions to yourself, being kind & teaching your kids to be kind could make a huge difference to someones day. We (parents of ASD superstars) live on a permanent plain of anxiety, trying to forward guess and anticipate the needs of our kids. Sometimes dealing with all the extra un-neccesary sh*t is the bit that breaks us. Claire Meldrum.
6. Accepting nothing but the best for your child is the hardest part of parenting for all but more so for those whose kids fall within the spectrum. Expect nothing but greatness from them for it is there! Celebrate those moments and accept that labelled children are as capable of aspiring as those without. To all aim for the stars and if you only make the moon ... what an achievement. Mandy Lord-Newcombe.
7. I worry what will happen to my child if I die. Anon.
8. No, they are not all like Rainman. Anon.
9. Too many to list, I'd be on my soapbox forever! Michelle Beard ;)
10. Acceptance isn't much of an issue for us here. People seem to have come a long way here but still much more to do. The biggest thing we find is, especially with older generations, Is the idea that if your child is not doing something that you want them to do, if they're not responding the way that you want them to, or if they're not eating dinner today but they ate yesterday is getting people to understand that disciplining the child is not going to change that. When they have sensory issues and things like that it doesn't matter what you do it's not gonna change it so it's learning to not only accept them but learning to adjust to them learning to compromise and to find a way of working with them on a level that they will work with you. It can be really hard sometimes for adults to give children that respect. Adults often just assume that there the adult you're the child so your to do whatever they say. So I think that I think that's been the biggest issue for us, is getting people to understand that sometimes you have to change your way of thinking and you have to change the way that you approach them and not the other way around. Serenity Lane Beard, USA.
Thanks for sticking with me and reading my second blog during Autism Awareness Week.